What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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