But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
Randomize
