He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
All I want is to send a text that says "i slept with someone while wearing nothing but purple argyle socks this weekend." But the only person i would send that to is you. But you already know. Because they were your socks.
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Randomize
