so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
Randomize
