fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
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