Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Randomize