The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
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