i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
Randomize
