Don't you send me to vm
guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
You sat on a wall pretending to be a gargoyle before shouting "batman!" and jumping at me
I'm the drunk Des Moines deserves, but not the one it needs
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Randomize
