you would pick up someone in the library
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
Randomize
