So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Randomize
