WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
I just woke up in my car with half the wedding cake next to me. This will not end well.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
Randomize