the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
