i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
This girl is more easily done than said...
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
Just got booked to do a bachelorette party for a polygamist wedding. And notice I only text you to rub things in your face and show you my life shits on yours. Daily.
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
Randomize
