He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
yeah, I said "hi, I'm the creepy old guy at the college bar" and she said that she like mature men, wasn't expecting that line to work
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
Randomize
