I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
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