Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Randomize
