ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
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