I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
Randomize
