So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
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