I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
