I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
i think im in europe. pls send help
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Randomize
