it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
I'm not sure what's more surprising, the fact that she said I reminded her of Danny Devito, or the fact that it got me laid.
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
