In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
Randomize
