Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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