Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
Is your liver wearing a sombrero yet?
No...more like a life jacket.
So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
my mom just threw water on me to get me awake and is screaming "where is my fucking car?!"
you gave me a ride last nite what the hell did you do with it after you left me?
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
Randomize
