ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
Randomize