i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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