four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
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