Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
I cut my penus on the lid.
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
Randomize
