Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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