My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
