I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
I have peed in a lot of sinks
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
Randomize
