i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
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