He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
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