I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
Bring me that man meat
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
Randomize
