I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
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