i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
tell your sister to shave her snatch
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
Guess who just stumbled into work hungover, wearing yesterday's clothes, covered in hickeys and glitter, and carrying a giant bottle of rum in her purse.
I just took plan B at work.
This is the greatest story of all time.
Randomize