it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
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