Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
I guess when the asshole said “I really miss you and want to get back together” he actually meant “I’m banging a Hooters girl behind your back.”
I hope she gives him gonorhea
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