Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
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