i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Randomize
