Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
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