You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
Randomize
