i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
Randomize
