How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
