Is it normal to miss your booty call?
So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
Randomize
