Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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