alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
MIDGETS
????
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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