like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
As shirtless as possible
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Randomize
